unpredictable

today.
new day for another part of story.

i thought that our life can predict. i mean it's predictable because our live will be like a story.
we watch the movie, drama. it will be like that. reason i said like that is because we have our own character.
who we are?. who are you? policeman, fireman, doctor, lecturer. logic!

we have our own character and we play that character till death come to us.

but life is unpredictable. we don't know what will happen next.

that scared me,

my future still blur . . .

.. the end

-_-'''

Assalammualaikum.

terasa bosan di sini. . . mungkin aku aku rojakkan blog nie dengan english dan melayu. aku memang benci nak jadi datin(beli) dan dato(beli) tapi apakan daya. idea yang selalu ade semuanya macam rojak buah . . . 

(perosak bahasa)

first of all. . . i admit that it's been long time haven't update this blog. and really sorry that this blog just too lame. . . because of contain. but hey! this is my blog. . . u can find other blog if you like. hohoho. . .

and what i want to share with you it's just a lame story you know, it's about 'the shit'. . . . 

kerja_kerja_kerja. . . tue je laa yang aku tahu sekarang. sebabkan aku muda lagi soo aku kerja laa.. hidup mati kerana duit. yeah! semuanye kerana duit. hahaha. . . the thing is, i don't have any girls that can entertain me. . . it's not bout sex you idiot!. like other people the hangout after work hour with their own lovely partner. . . soo like me! im just a lonely guys and i go shopping mall with me myself. and to be honest. i love it. seconds i hate it. because dont have 'a' partners . . .  

after work hour my activity is just watching movie. . . and spent money to satisfied my lust like watch movie. . . yeah.. just watching movie. i don't know. why i felt two feeling in one time. is it empty?. . . hmm.. soo lame rite. . .

the disadvantage that i got like felt lonely. but the advantage that i got like  can make decision, can do anything that i want like play escalator. . . hahaha. . . then money can save from buy food and drink.(just bring from home), free to do anything. . . no talking-talking and etc. (perhaps) 

but i can't fight this feeling. i mean felt lonely. i walked to TGV KLCC then i saw a couple. . they just look cool. . . pakai tudung labuh, baju kurung labuh. .  pakai songkok. . . berbaju melayu. . sumpah smart. . . and pegang tangan. . . wow.. muke budak kowt. . . . tinggi-tinggi aku je. . . tapi. . . (masalah ke?) hahahaha

aku rase bertuahnye manusia tue. . . ada partner and bahagia dengan cara dia. 

k laa.. nak balik da.  nanti free.. aku update lagi . . :)

broken english

Assalammualaikum

it's been long time (about 2 month perhaps) haven't update my blog. it's because of lacking idea and don't know what should i post in this blog. i read a lot's of blog and they are super brighter smartest than me. i wonder from where i can get the idea to share with reader. perhaps that answer will come. . . even the truth is nothing come easily.

the broken english.
recently, i read my blog and i think i not just lacking idea but also lacking in grammar and also proper english words. that's embarrassing but i know. . . i still need to improve my language. at lease i try and not hesitate to use english.

3 week ago, i go to klcc where i hangout with my friends. and plop, and english man stand in front of me and ask me the way go to isetan. hahaha. . . i speak well.. not to (show off)  and i felt glad because he do understand me and find the way to go to isetan, a few hour later i met that guy and he smile at me.perhaps thats the way he thanks to me. . . plus, perhaps that was her wife. . . smile at me too. . .

i try. . . n keep trying to improve my english. . .

read! lazy. . .

Assalammualaikum

as a blogger we all know that the blogger love to read and like to express the story in blog.
share every moment. every joy of life. to be honest i don't like to read, before i start blogging.
till that day came and make me realize that we as a human have to read and love to read no matter what is it. whether book, news paper or signboard anyway places we go we have to read. we're not counting ... it is true.. like example. i drove a car. go to sabak bernam from KL. and when i drove my car(chewah.. cam kete aku plak.. padahal kete mak aku). i read the signboard, the advertisement board, the plate car number etc while drove the car. see.. everyday we read. the moral. everybody must loves to read. for own benefit.

blog change my life. . . . 

there's a lot's of examples that i can gave but enough laa ea.. hehehe... perhaps 1 example enough...


and i don't remember day that i go KLCC to go kinokuniya alone. i heard some other old guy said to someone.. he said.. people who are lazy today, will die tomorrow because of lazy yesterday.
and people who are lazy to read, he will be regret because he doesn't care about himself infact nobody will show the him the way to success unless if he read.
and lazy is just for stone.


when i think again. that old guy tell the truth and it certainly makes sense..

im not good enough

Assalammualaikum


yes. im not good enough. people like me.. easily fall in love. fall deeply.
why every single day i trough full of memories bout her. why?
im always remember her.. the tears fall everyday. and i still stuck with her...
i do love her and still in love with her.

i know that i should move on. go forward straight and never turning back.

is it really easy to do that? mmm... maybe she with someone that more better than me...

i still cry even just now i smile or laugh....

why i fall in love with her...

.........

the hardest thing

Assalammualaikum...

i can't sleep. soo perhaps after this entry i can sleep. . . .

why we must fall in love...
to be honest.. its been 5 years before i know her.. i'm single and didn't fall in love till that day. . . i fall in love with her..
now.. everything were totally different. why we fall in love?

she's adorable rite... lovely smile. everyday. with her pix.

T-T

Assalammualaikum.

kebelakangan nie.. kenapa aku terigat kat dia... and dia da lupakan aku. semua kisah suka duka dia aku ingat. dia cerita tentang adik beradik dia.cerita tentang anak dia, (anak sedare). share story bout family. past and bercinta. . . . malangnye cinta itu hanyalah perasaan sementara... ia datang dan pergi.. da 3 bulan tak dengar suara dia.. susah nak call dia.. and dia da tak perlukan aku lagi... aku menangis bile dengar ceramah tentang 'kahwin mude' kat youtube.. kelaka dan dalam pada masa yang sama.. mengalir air mata. terkenang kenangan manis dan janji dari dua insan bercinta.

"bercinta tak semestinya berkahwin. perkahwinan itu adalah bonus! cinta itu pengorbanan. cinta itu nak pastikan orang yang kita sayang hidup bahagia". itulah kata2 penceramah.... setiap kali aku bercinta. aku harap aku dapat bahagiakan pasangan aku. hmmm...

macam mana dia sekarang.....
dia dengan siapa sekarang.....

michael buble

Assalammualaikum.

michael buble. i like the way michael buble. his music make me calm. and i wish can see him. live. in front of me. but it's not gonna be happen.. michael buble song make me like sit like a dead people and calm. great is it. . .

listen the michael buble song. . . great :)

i still love her

Assalammualaikum.

i can't sleep because when i close my eyes. her face. suddenly appear .
i do love her. but i can't force her to love me like i love her. everything change so fast. things that i can't cope, i face it. people laugh at me. it's embarrass. it's been long time haven't heard her voice. my life. felt empty without her. i cry for nothing.

men like me... cry because she dump me. what silly. perhaps other will find other. but me.. i can't . . . i still love her. now everything change and time move forward. i wonder, how she is rite now? i do worry bout her . no words, no call, no chat, etc.

for the first time, i chat with her sister. i felt little bit scared. because her sister already married. at the same time i chat with her brother in law.

hmm.. things become too complicated. how i can fix that relationship. hmm.. all the moment... the story.. sweet memories play. i can't hold my tear.

i still remember. at puduraya.thats was the first met. ever in my life between me and her. before this. i communicated using facebook, phone... she look soo adorable, lovely, cute, plus, i can't compare her with others. she stare focus at her phone, while i look at her face clearly. i want to talk with her but she busy with her phone soo i let her finish first with her phone. (seriously, that was really stupid thing that i have done) because a few minutes later her sister n brother in law come stand in front of gate to pick her up. no words that i can say at that time just 'good bye' . . .
i really disappointed with myself. why i let her go just like that and didn't say anything before she left. the precious moment just come once. hmm..

i wish that i can see her again. i do love her. i don't wanna lose her but i can't do anything. she change totally different. she doesn't have love towards me. and move along forward without look back. that's really pain to me. to see her go ....

there's no bidder. only tears fall before sleep.

hasil kerja dia 

lovely-kan... :' ) 

i always pray her. happy always . . 

and i can't forget bout her. it's really pain. i rarely open her picture. because i will cry. (silly kan..)

thats all for today.. 

pleks

assalammualaikum..

it's just like 2 century haven't update the blog. like a corpse wake up then update blog.. ok.. kidding.
it is because i don't have any idea to put any story in my blog. that's lame.. other have their own blog and know how to share their story well. but i felt like too complicated. afraid what i post in my blog, people will think bad. because people different even all human in this world Allah create same. different people, different perspective view. i hope i can always update my blog and share with others especially my readers. i know my english like 'langsam' gitu je.. but i don't care bout it. at least i try my best. people today moving forward without looking at the back. i know certain people would see back and can't let go the past. stuck in the middle of past and present. that's really (fuck)...

i would like to type in this blog. the truth bout me. i got lazy eyes. it's true. that's why when i in relationship with someone. girls will leave me just like that. to be honest. i don't hate girls but i hate bitch which mean damn filthy fucking girl. seriously. play my heart feeling just like that.

the reason why break up because felt boring, and because of the lazy eyes!. and it's time to change. i know that.. it's just in relationship!. but hey! if we not change to be more serious n fucking seriously in relationship. don't blame other if anything happen in the future. girls like that, i mean like bitch.. filthy whore, or what ever it is, didn't deserve to get a true love.

i got lazy eyes since age 9 . if i not mistake. people like me do have a problem in public especially public speaking because of my eyes. the eyes contact was really fucking worst. but i not afraid stand in front of audience. i can, but just little bit stammer... i know speak english well but not english highest level. i learn to that level. because i want to be like other people out there that can take an advantage/ opportunity to change living standard. i want to be like tan sri zeti akhtar aziz, Tan Sri Dato' Setia Haji Ambrin bin Buang, and lot other people out there and so on.. people like that... it is great when we know speak english well, can communicate well with foreigner, speech in front of thousand audience(melalut suda)

to me.. lazy eyes is my specialty. why? because people been confuse when they see me. they will be felt like really weird. because they don't know i see who and so on.. hahaha.. but believe my. my eyes vision  clear and no double vision. . . u know that i mean.. different view at the same time like sesumpah..

the moral here is.. i think maybe we should be confident not over confident but still we need to believe that we can face the challenges, people around me and so on.. hahaha..

sincere from me.. the juling